"Sex is just lame and boring," he said, right after fucking me.
So this past Sunday was my brrrrthday!!! Yeah grrrrl. Whatever. I'm 26 now, which doesn't even fucking matter because life is going to suck into perpetuity for me, so who gives a fuck. Sorry, I feel very nihilistic right now. So I went back to Raleigh for my bday. I had a shit ton of fun, though I pissed off all of my friends and they left me. How did I piss off my friends? one word, Josh. Josh and I have known each other since I was like 19..he works with Scott, one of my really good friends (side note: Scott is one of the most amazing people that I have ever met, and I am so privileged to know him). Anyway, Josh and I were going to fuck last year for my birthday, but he was a complete mess and I wasn't into it. This year we all met a Poole's and ate dinner. I proceeded to get pretty motherfucking drunk, thanks to Julie pranking me. After Poole's, we all go to Neptunes to dance. I'm not sure how it happened, but Josh and I started dancing, then making out...next thing I know his slapping my vagina with the palm of his hand. And yes, my trashy ass did all of this in front of a group of misplaced Yuppies. Eventually we realized that EVERYONE had left us. What in the fuck. Julie sent this:
"Hey mama we are heading outs u are makin out w josh have the best time xoxo"
I thought that was fucked up. You couldn't have tapped me on the shoulder? Thrown a glass of cold water on me?! Whatevs. So Josh and I go back to his place. We get in his bed and start making out. He turns my pussy into a sock puppet with his fingers..I'm retarded wet. Then I move towards his dick, in an attempt to give him what would have been the best blow job he'd ever had (I have personal references that can attest to my amazing head-giving skills). He stops me. "I don't like blow jobs." I have a mini-stroke. WHAT?!?! WHAT?! WHAT?! My mind was motherfucking blown. After that, I lost the impetus to want to fuck him. Sure, it was still good the first time, but....
I FUCKING LOVE GIVING BLOW JOBS!!!! It turns me on beyond belief, and I can barely fuck without having had the guy's cock in my mouth at least once. It makes me stupid wet and I love dick more than I can ever use words to convey it. I FUCKING LOVE COCK. So I realized that although cock in a pussy is cool, sex without foreplay is lame. And of course my pussy is pining for {NR}'s cock now. He was such an amazing lay. MIND BLOWING lay. I miss fucking him soooooooooo much. I don't miss him, but I miss his cock. For all of his insecurities and craziness, he didn't let it affect him sexually. He's a sleeper-bang. Looking at him, you would not think that he could fuck...but HOLY SHIT. So amazing at EVERYTHING. I miss that dick. Anyway, back to the issue at hand. So the next day we vegged out. He had some project to do for a potential job. He was really sweet and made me breakfast and tea. I watched Prometheus while he worked. It was really awesome just hanging. We went to dinner with Scott that night, and afterwards we went back to his place and attempted to have sex again. I couldn't stay wet, which had nothing to do with him (to a degree). He wears Magnums, which dry my pussy up to no end. And the lack of foreplay didn't help. It sucks when you see the potential, you know the person can fuck, but there's something missing. I feel as though it's so selfish to be closed off and have stupid hang-ups when you're fucking someone. You owe it to the person you're with to at least try and get outside of your fucking head. I think that's why the sex with {NR} was so amazing..we were both so focused on the other that it made the sex explosive. It was obvious that he was not going to stop until I came, and that I wasn't either..which is why I had orgasm after orgasm after orgasm with him..vaginally. Okay, now I'm going to cry. But anyway, I sent josh a text message saying that he made me feel like a shitty lay because he was so insecure about everything. He didn't really take me seriously. I told him that I wasn't going to fuck him ever again. He compared me to his ex and called me dramatic. How sad. I really don't have any plans to ever fuck him again. I think that at the end of it, I would have fucked up hang-ups about sex, and I don't. He's not a bad guy, and we have fun when we hang..we're just not sexually compatible..which sucks, because he's soooo motherfucking hot..oh well.
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